Little Earthquakes
by Jul3s
Summary: Epilogue to 4.18 - When Worlds Collide


**A/N:** My musae are driving, I'm just riding shotgun. I also bawled while watching _"When Worlds Collide"_, for a multitude of reasons. There's other stuff that needs to be written, but this wanted out, badly.

* * *

**Little Earthquakes**

by Jules

They were sitting in the back garden, the table with their unfinished dinner and countless unspoken arguments between them, dividing them farther than the real distance of merely four feet, when Alan walked up to them.

"Neither one of you want to talk about it? It's a hell of a big elephant in a relatively small yard."

Don looked away. Dad and his infinite wisdom. What was there to talk about that would actually change anything? The damage was done and now, the decision about Charlie's future was out of their hands, his hands, for good.

He watched Charlie look away and draw a breath as if he was about to say something, but he stayed silent after all.

"Right," their father sighed and sat down at the table.

Charlie drew another breath and finally spoke without making any eye contact with either of them. "It's kind of amazing that we worked... together as long as we did."

God, it sounded so simple out of Charlie's mouth, but Don knew it wasn't. It had been four years of working together and they both had changed, had gravitated to and fro until they'd established a somewhat healthy balance. Had both given a little ground and gained so much more in terms of their relationship. Charlie working for the bureau had been good, for them, for Charlie. Hell, some of his input had been immeasurable, Don simply couldn't imagine anyone else doing what Charlie had done. And now his little brother had gone and maybe destroyed it all purely out of idealism. And he had no idea how massive the repercussions of that for all of them would turn out to be. This really hadn't been a good week, with the case and Megan leaving, and his mood tonight mirrored that.

"You know," Alan said, breaking into his reverie, "this is not the first time this house has been divided by a fundamental disagreement. That year Charlie spent at MIT? Remember when he came home? Now that was a shocker."

Oh, yeah. He did remember all too well. The new Charlie, as he'd dubbed him back then. Exuberant, outgoing, constantly ticking him off whenever he was home between college and games. There had hardly ever been a day without fights, without him wishing his brother back to the east coast and the mere thought of what they'd achieved since then and possibly were about to lose now constricted Don's throat.

"Yeah, so, I'm a Celtics fan." Charlie smiled almost impishly, catching their father's drift immediately. "It happens, even in good families."

"Actually, not really, not in LA." Don's smile didn't really belie the slight crack in his voice, but it felt good. He met Charlie's eyes for real this time, relishing in the fact that they always had one common ground to retreat to -- humor. They'd become so good at it, even and especially when times were dire. At the end of the day, it always boiled down to what was important. Family. No one could ever take that away from them.

The positive vibe wafted through the air, touching them all with featherlight tendrils. But the ringing of his cell cut it short much too soon, forcing reality back into the foreground.

At this time of the day, this could only mean work. Don didn't need to see their faces to know they all thought the same.

He answered curtly, listened to the message relayed. "Okay, I'm on my way." Glancing briefly at Charlie, he clipped his phone back onto his belt.

_I'm sorry, buddy._

"Alright." He rose, slipping back almost effortlessly into his professional shell, and walked off towards the Suburban parked at the curb, both Charlie and their father trailing after him.

"See you guys later, huh?" he threw over his shoulder, turning around to glance at Charlie once more. Knowing how strange this felt for him, he could only guess how his brother fared. Not that much better, if his expression was any indication.

"Hey, Don?"

Now the catch had jumped ship, making Charlie's voice sound raspy. He turned around, already halfway in the car and looked at his brother.

"Just watch yourself."

_Aw, man. Don't make this sound like good-bye, buddy._ But the professional shell was firmly in place. "You too."

He climbed in, ignited the engine and rose two fingers as a farewell. Driving off like this had never felt more awkward, but he had no time to dwell on it now.

XOXOX

Some part of him, definitely not the logical and analytical scientist, felt like the odd kid left out. Charlie knew deep inside that if faced with the same situation again, he'd still make the same decision; his beliefs were still the same. But watching Don leave and knowing that when he came by for dinner the next evening, there wouldn't be any information sharing, no asking his opinion, that maybe everything was back to how it had been 4 years ago, hurt nonetheless.

Trying to justify and redeem Phil Sanjrani's work had felt right, for all the scientific reasons, for the greater good. But facing the ramifications, the loss of his security clearance, the endangerment of his consultant work and maybe even his professorship if he really went to trial, now he thought that maybe, just maybe the price was too high.

"This is gonna be harder than I thought," he said.

"I think it's... to be continued," his father simply answered and there was so much conviction in his father's voice that Charlie hoped he was right.

XOXOX

He wasn't sure at first what had woken him, dragged him back from the bottomless pit of dreamless sleep to the semi-darkness of his bedroom, but the beeping of car alarms outside combined with the ebbing vibrations he could still feel put Don into the picture pretty quickly.

Earthquake. Another one. Probably not even a 4.0. They'd had quite a few minor tremors recently, but this was nothing compared to the tremors Charlie's little email would cause.

Don crossed an arm over his eyes and listened as the din outside slowly receding. He hadn't hit his own bed until well after 2am, their newest case demanding all his attention. And without Megan they were one short, which didn't make things easier. _Don't go there..._

Dawn slowly crept over the sky and Don thought back over the last couple of days. Phil Sanjrani, Mazari, Rafiq, Shane O'Hanahan. His own brother breaking federal law. Had he maybe inadvertently pushed him to make the wrong decision by staying firm with his stance?

Charlie had been right in his prediction that Sanjrani wasn't a terrorist, but he'd still brushed him off when his brother had confronted him with the facts after O'Hanahan had been revealed.

_"Charlie, I promise you, he will get his day in court." _

God, he could be an ass sometimes. But it had become harder and harder to do the right thing for the right reasons lately. Sometimes, he was simply tired of walking the tightrope.

Angels and devils. Predisposition of perception. Thinking black and white. Maybe there really weren't any shades of grey left in his world anymore.

Don scrubbed his hands over his face and rolled out of bed. It was quite clear that he wouldn't get any more sleep this night.

XOXOX

"Hey Dad."

Don pushed through the swing door into the kitchen, the sweat from his 12 mile run still clinging to his skin. It had done a world of good to him, chasing away demons and clearing his head.

His father looked up from his frying pan. "Donnie. I didn't expect you this early."

"Yeah, well, the quake gave me a head start."

"I distinctly remember times when you conveniently slept through those," Alan said with a sideways glance and busied himself once more with scrambling eggs.

Don sighed inwardly and decided against answering, he wasn't really up for that particular and ever-recurring discussion. He grabbed a slice of toast and leaned against the counter.

"Charlie already up?" he asked between bites.

"Whatever gave your brother his head start, I don't know. But he's gone already. Said he had tons of work to catch up at the university."

Don contemplated that while he finished the toast and caught his father's probing gaze a moment too late.

"Anything in particular you wanted to discuss with him?"

Ah, well. There was no use pretending sometimes. "I might have... might have said something that pushed Charlie in the wrong direction."

His father stopped his stirring and looked up, an odd expression growing in his features.

"Come on, Donnie. Do you really think whatever you said or didn't say eventually steered Charlie into the decision he made? I think you're underestimating your brother."

Dad and his infinite wisdom. Don had to smile. "Yeah, you're probably right. He does have a head of his own."

"I'd say so. Now, how about you catch a shower and I finish breakfast. I hope you brought some time."

An odd and unexpected wave of affection for his father washed over Don and he picked another slice of toast to avoid looking up. "Sounds like a deal." He clapped his father on the shoulder, the only sign of gratitude he could bring himself to show, and turned to leave.

XOXOX

The swing door slowly creaked to a stop while his eldest son's footsteps beat up the stairs and the shower sprang to life only moments later. Alan closed his eyes for a moment before pulling the fridge open to fetch more eggs. And bacon. Pancakes and bacon sounded about right.

Some thirty-odd years ago, when he and Margaret had decided to have kids, they could not have known how their boys would turn out. He could still clearly remember the moments when he held his sons for the very first time and how proud he felt back then, as well as the defining moments of each of their youth. Charlie's first win at a math contest, Donnie's first home run, all those staple moments of fatherhood.

But what he never anticipated, and it still filled him with pride and just a tiny bit of sorrow, was that parenting, especially these two obviously was a lifetime job.

THE END


End file.
